The Difference Between Resting and Numbing Out
Let’s be honest, most of us are tired. Tired from work, tired from responsibilities, tired from carrying the quiet weight of our thoughts. And when we’re tired, we look for relief.
But here’s the thing: not all relief is the same. Sometimes what feels like “rest” in the moment—scrolling, zoning out, binge-watching, keeping endlessly busy—leaves us just as drained as before. That’s because it isn’t rest. It’s numbing out.
And while numbing out isn’t always “bad” (sometimes it’s the only thing that gets us through), it doesn’t actually restore us. It doesn’t refill the tank.
What Numbing Out Looks Like
Numbing out is sneaky because it mimics rest. It gives you a break from reality, but only on the surface.
It might look like:
Losing track of time while scrolling through social media
Streaming episode after episode, but not remembering what you watched
Filling your schedule so you don’t have to feel lonely, sad, or anxious
Reaching for your phone the second you feel uncomfortable in the quiet
It feels easier in the moment. You don’t have to face your thoughts. You don’t have to feel. But afterward, you’re not lighter, you’re heavier. You’re left with the same stress you started with, plus maybe a side of guilt for “wasting time.”
What Real Rest Looks Like
Real rest isn’t about escaping. It’s about letting your mind and body slow down enough to recharge.
It might look like:
Taking a slow walk without music or podcasts, just noticing your surroundings
Letting yourself nap without guilt
Listening to music and actually paying attention to how it makes you feel
Journaling to release what’s been swirling in your head
Stretching, breathing deeply, or sitting in silence for a few minutes
Real rest doesn’t always feel comfortable at first. Stillness can bring up feelings we’ve been avoiding. Quiet can feel strange when we’re used to noise. But if you stick with it, rest gently fills you back up in a way numbing never will.
Why It Matters
When you numb out, you press pause on your feelings. When you rest, you give those feelings space to soften and shift. Numbing delays what’s underneath. Rest helps you carry it differently.
And this matters, because how you choose to restore yourself affects how you show up in the rest of your life. If you’re constantly numbing, you may function, but you’ll never really feel restored. If you choose rest, you may feel uncomfortable at first, but you’ll actually heal.
Permission to Rest
Here’s the reminder you may need most: rest is not a reward you earn by doing enough. It’s a need, just like food or water. You don’t have to prove you deserve it.
If you notice yourself reaching for numbing habits, don’t shame yourself. Those habits were probably the best tools you had at the time. They helped you cope. They helped you survive. But survival isn’t the end goal. You deserve to feel alive, not just “not overwhelmed.”
So next time you’re tired, pause before you open another app or let Netflix auto-play. Ask yourself:
“Is this giving me true rest or am I just numbing out?”
Then give yourself permission to choose the thing that restores you, even if it feels strange at first. Because the more you practice rest, the more you’ll realize it isn’t laziness. It’s what makes you strong enough to keep going.
You don’t need to numb your life to survive it. You deserve to rest in it, fully.
